In intimacy everything goes, as long as the desire and integrity of each one of those involved is respected.
Many couples enjoy positions, erotic games, sex toys, fantasies, dirty words and others, they are a little more traditional.
A very common practice that in bed and in the intimate sphere, lovers do not call each other with their names, but with nicknames, derived from different situations.
Carol Bruess and Judy Pearson, from the University of Ohio, conducted a study, in which they interviewed various couples, from newlyweds to some who had been together for several years. The results revealed that most couples use at least one nickname, which is reflected in a happy relationship.
Some of these nicknames are words created especially for that person and there are those who say that it is the easiest way to maintain a good relationship.
For others, these words are very “cheesy”, but there are those who say that they are a certain key to light or maintain the flame of passion in a couple. Of course, there are people who can’t stand them, so the effect is totally different on them, being more of a source of disgust than pleasure. Bruess points out that the use of love language in the couple is a symbolic way of showing that the relationship matters enough to develop their own way of speaking, defining a clear dividing line between the couple and the rest of the world.
In many cases, the use of the nickname, preferably combined with a sensual tone of voice, is a clear invitation to start the erotic game or to propose it for later.
The most used
The list of nicknames is infinite, since it depends on the imagination of each one and the particular circumstances that the couple has gone through.
· The parts of the body are the origin of various nicknames. “Cheeks”, “big eyes”, “dimples”, “goldilocks”, “my beard” are very common. And of course, those that allude to sexual organs, too. · Sometimes the bed becomes a real sweet shop: “caramelito”, “bonboncito”, “chocolate cupcake”, “coconut ball”, there is a veritable “arsenal” of nicknames that allude to sweet culinary delights. The variations are endless and depend on personal taste.
· And from the sweet shop, we go to the zoo or better yet, to the jungle: “little mouse”, “kitten”, “lioness”, “little bird”, “tiger”, they get into bed and do their thing.
· Nature is a frequent inspiration for the nicknames that couples use. Thus, “my sun”, “my moon”, “my light”, “my star”, gain intimate space and ignite passion and love.
· “Queen”, “my king”, “my princess”, “my prince”: royalty also has its place in the origin of intimate nicknames.
In a survey carried out by the University of Almeria, they determined the most common nicknames in southern Spain: “cari” and “carino” are the most used, “nene”, “nena” and “neni” are in second position and ” Chiqui” is in third position. Interestingly, sometimes couples also use nicknames that may seem insulting, but are signs of affection. Two very popular terms are “fat” and “ugly” and they reach affection and love through the opposite.
What do they mean?
As we have already seen, the variety of nicknames is multiple and others were still missing from the list such as “baby”, “love”, “heaven” and “my life”. By calling our partner with a nickname, we make it very clear that he or she is not just any person, but that he or she is someone very special. This creates intimacy, harmony and a positive and intimate bond in the relationship. In addition, now that person is no longer the one that everyone knows, in our field she is another unique and unrepeatable one and we attribute qualities that only we know.
Thus, those of the type “queen”, “king” or similar, denote the importance that person has for us, while others, such as “bear” or “bonbon”, have more to do with tenderness, sweetness and the affections
If you say “tiger” to your partner, you are surely alluding to their fiery and fierceness in bed, but if you mention it as something edible… well, you want to “eat” it.
Saying “Superman” to our partner alludes to his sexual vigor and naming him after a movie character will give him some special attribute. On these occasions, nicknames work as a useful support for fantasies, important to continue keeping alive the flame of passion and love. Role plays are a valid alternative to achieve pleasure and many couples use them more or less frequently. At the time of sexual encounter, many couples say exciting words to each other to raise the temperature and thus reach orgasm. Many women often call their partners “daddy” and this can confuse their partner, as they think they are having a fantasy about their father.
Actually, using “daddy” as a nickname in private has nothing to do with a parental fixation. Actually, it is an affirmation in the sense that the man is doing things well in bed, having to do with the sense of “boss”.
Alone is better
It’s okay to call our partner an affectionate nickname, to distinguish them from the rest of the people and reinforce affection. But one thing is important: from the most classic and conventional “honey” to the most elaborate and “playful”, they must be used in private. If you are in a group of people and you call your partner with one of these nicknames, some companions may find it annoying. Couple things work only in intimacy and exaggerated displays of affection and public love are not to everyone’s liking.
Also, if others know that intimate nickname, it loses a large part of its charm: that of being something private, intimate and only of the two.