They say that love is blind and there is some truth in this statement, because love does not understand reasons or coherence, once Cupid’s arrow has struck the right blow. When we find ourselves in a relationship, to the extent that everything progresses, the differences between the two, those that you have not noticed at first, come to the fore little by little. Many times the causes can be things do not always turn out as expected and in that desire to give the best of ourselves to the loved one, we end up discovering that something happens with that reciprocity that combines a couple in love. If things do not go as we would like, letting go of what is not for us is the best decision, but how to stop loving it? We give you some clues.
Making the decision to end that relationship is not something so simple. Taking that first step implies the acceptance of having experienced a failure, of having lost a battle in which we thought we were the conquerors of safe territory. It costs mainly, because we feel undervalued, insecure, we wonder what we failed, when we thought we were giving everything on our part. Fears run over us and take us by storm, but we hardly think that he simply wasn’t the one and that the best of our lives is yet to come.
The fight to end those fears
The first of the mistakes we make is trying to carry the relationship forward, despite everything, because we think about the “later”, that how everything will be later and it is very difficult for us to imagine ourselves alone, we feel fear, that fear of accepting failure. without remedy and a fear that loneliness will become infinite.
In that state, what you should think about is that, already within that relationship, you are alone. Alone without that love you need, alone because you don’t feel understood, because you give too much without receiving the same, perhaps alone because that common space that should be generated in every couple, was never generated and you don’t feel contained. You must start by understanding that, if you feel so bad in your relationship, it is because your partner does not value you as you deserve, because his love was never the measure of yours and he will not be able to hold your hand when you need it. When you truly love, you feel, you see, you notice. It is not just saying it with words, it is perceived in each attitude.
You should know that, when you leave that relationship, you will be safe with those people who do love and value you, those who surround you all the time like family and friends. Learn to value yourself, to love yourself, you will not be able to truly love if you do not love and respect yourself, part of it is letting go of relationships that do not do you any good, where love is not enough for you.
Taking the first step can be painful, but if there is a great truth in all relationships, it is that nobody dies of love. Let go of what doesn’t make you happy, go through that duel that will allow you to get rid of all the anguish that you have left for it. cry. It’s not bad when it serves to free the soul, but don’t do it forever. It is about going through that process in which we learn to let go of the sorrows that cause us suffering and gather strength to dare to return to the ring when we are ready. The people who surround you and love you, undertake new projects and distract you, will be your best allies.
Learn to free your mind
If you’ve made the decision to put on your heels and retrace your steps, just do it. When you have undertaken the withdrawal you must do it with conviction and not pulling the anchor that you have left unheeded just in case. If you leave, do not stay waiting for him to come looking for you, nor do you take pains to show yourself before his eyes with someone to get his attention. So you will not free your heart from his, from his memories. Starting over means leaving everything behind and sailing towards other waters where yes, your love will have a place.
It’s hard. Laying your head on the pillow every night can bring back your memories, places, people, situations, everything seems to conspire so that the memory returns to knock on the doors of your soul, where the feelings are still lukewarm. Learn to free your mind, let go of distressing thoughts, do the exercise of looking forward.
If he was ever the perfect man, he must cease to be.
Take off the veil and observe those defects that you were not able to see. Demystifying that man you deified for a long time will make the disappointment run faster down the stream. That unpleasant character to which you used to find all the excuses, that way of seeing the world so different from yours that you identified as “necessary differences”, but in reality they were the asymmetries that separated them. All those things that you have tried to justify are actually to add to the triggers of the inevitable end of that relationship.
Everything counts so that you wake up to life and gain momentum to start over. Love yourself, value yourself. That special and ideal person for you must find a woman who is sure of herself and of the paths she wants to travel in life.
