“By asking you get to Rome” goes the saying and paraphrasing it, we can say that one of the keys to reaching maximum pleasure is simply asking our partner about their tastes and preferences. To do this, it is necessary to sell certain resentments, prejudices and inhibitions, because even in the XXI century false and double standards, taboos and preconceptions about sex continue to exist.
One of the keys to enjoying intimate relationships is to get to know each other very well and although sometimes we are embarrassed and do not dare to ask the questions that we have “on the tip of our tongues”, encouraging us to get rid of those doubts with simple questions is the healthiest, besides that it can bring many benefits for both.
Many times we are sure that our partner loves what we do in bed, but perhaps the reality is very different. Sometimes these misunderstandings drag on for years, bringing different repercussions. It may also be that you have been in a new relationship for a short time and you want to improve your technique or improve your arrival with that person.
The simplest solution is to ask your partner, bluntly, some of the following questions:
1. What things do you not like to do or that they do to you in bed? Sexual intercourse should be an enjoyment for both members of the couple, so if they have to do or let someone do something to them that they don’t like, obviously that won’t happen.
2. What is your favorite position? Sexual positions are important because they can totally change the intimate experience, so asking about preferences is a good step. Of course, they can always be changed or varied to put a little extra spice in the relationship. 3. Is there any part of your body where you would like me to caress you more? Our body has the wonderful possibility of being totally erogenous, since there are countless places where nerve endings abound. In addition, the human being is psychosexual, so the mind can be considered one more sexual organ and therefore any part of the body is potentially erogenous. Questioning (and exploring) are the keywords in this topic.
4. What makes you explode with pleasure? This question is related to the previous point, since the variation of erogenous zones is practically infinite.
5. What do you enjoy most about sex with me? Would you like to try something we’ve never done? This question is already on the personal level and the questioner, of course, must be willing to be told that something is not so pleasant. 6. What is your favorite type of porn? Although many “demonize” pornography, others consider it a valid way to achieve arousal. In any case, it is good to inquire about it.
7. Would you like us to watch porn together? Question related to the previous point, since it can be a great approach door. Of course, there are people who don’t like porn one bit; In those cases, you have to turn off the television.
8. Do you have any fantasy that you would like to try and you are afraid to tell me? In the field of sexual fantasies, everything is allowed, as long as the desire and the right to say “no” of any of those involved are not violated. Fantasies are a privileged way to achieve pleasure, so inquiring about it can represent a great gain for both. 9. When a girl leads you, do you like her or do you get offended? Some men don’t even cross their minds that the woman is in charge in bed, but others simply love it. As always, the only way to find out is…asking. And besides, the change of roles can be something very exciting in itself.
10. Is there anything that makes you feel insecure in bed? Insecurity is a sure path to displeasure, so it’s a good idea to ask about the things that make your partner feel that way and find a way to prevent that from happening.
11. Have I ever done something that “turned you down”? In sex, you have to be willing or willing to accept criticism, if it is so that both can achieve pleasure. Sometimes simple changes make a big difference.
12. What is the worst sexual experience you have had (so as not to repeat it)? Whenever a person’s sexual past is discussed, it is necessary to do so with great respect and without embarrassing anyone. In this case, the purpose is very useful: to know what bothers you to avoid it.
13. For you, what is the key to having good sex? Behind this simple question, may be the key for your partner to consider you an excellent partner in bed. Listen to what it tells you and apply it from now on. Surely your performance will improve by doing so. 14. Are you open to experiencing new things in bed? Which would be? Some people are more open about sex than others, so knowing what to expect is a good way to avoid bad times in bed. Sincerity in the answer is the key.
15. What are the sexual games that you like the most? This question is directly aimed at knowing how to face the previous sex and can make the difference between a great intimate encounter or a total fiasco.
16. Do you like “dirty” words when making love? Words are important, so much so that they make many people reach heaven… but others totally lose their desire. Knowing if your partner likes and excites swearing will make a big difference in sex. 17. Light off or on? Although the change is a simple click away, it is always good to ask, especially if it is a first time. Remember: the important thing is that your sexual partner feels comfortable in that moment.
18. Is there a question you wanted to answer that I didn’t ask you? The idea of this question is to open the playing field to your partner.
19. What would you ask me? It is about asking, but also about answering, since the communication must be back and forth.
These questions (and others that may occur to you) are the best starting point to improve the quality of your intimate encounters, as they will help you improve emotional and sexual communication with your partner. Let go of inhibitions and talk freely about sex.