People are not characterized by valuing what we have. We tend to waste and postpone the opportunities that life gives us to relate to our loved ones as if the absence that will come later does not matter to us, we do not dimension it. This laziness often gets complicated at the moment when the people who in principle should appreciate us, despise us. Situations of this type are extremely painful and that is why we must stop covering our eyes and try to remedy this situation. Sometimes these situations go from brown to dark and the best attitude we can adopt is to protect ourselves from this type of relationship that ends up deteriorating and undermining our self-esteem and emotional well-being.
You never know what you have until you lose it
Sounds like a phrase, right?, but it is unfortunately a reality. We have marked on fire that terrible habit of not valuing the present moment, the now, of appreciating and valuing what we do not have or what we have already lost. When suffering because someone ignores us, detracts from us, we do not realize that this is not a reflection of our personal worth and that it is most likely that this person will not do it because they are used to having us there always ready, always available. You have to know that it is useless to fight against all odds for a person who does not move a single finger for you. It is no use constantly helping someone who is not interested in serving us. It is not good for us to give without receiving, it wears you out and consumes you. It is a gross mistake to dedicate ourselves entirely to others and forget about ourselves.
The power to get away from the complicated is beneficial for our health
When we face complex situations in which someone important to us ignores us, we can and must make use of the enormous power of indifference. Making sure that what someone does or doesn’t do doesn’t affect us is like a balm. It may cost us at first, but believe it is worth the great effort when it comes to avoiding our emotional deterioration, in short: Give your absence when necessary.
In life we are not always at the right time or in the right place, and on many other occasions, we stay the time that corresponds to us to receive or give some teaching, it is the cycle of life, however, many times we do not value the passage of people through our lives, and we are not valued either. Staying close to someone at all costs can be going too far for us, so an excellent solution is to gift these people with our absence.
If we opt for this measure, we may have a tremendous internal struggle in which we are torn between waiting for it to return or restarting our lives permanently. First you will feel anguish, then life will give you the right answer, whatever it is. It is difficult to understand the emotions we feel, the sensations and feelings that are generated by each experience in this crazy life, likewise, it is much more complex to understand the feelings of others, but we must learn to withdraw, to accept when we no longer know. appreciate our presence and identify when we are not valued, otherwise, we will end up recording in our soul, suffering and sorrow, in the face of insecurity and the constant repetition of mistakes.
Eventually you will be able to have the certain notion that you acted correctly, whether the person has looked for you or has disappeared from your life definitively. Both attitudes are painful in the short term, but, without a doubt, finally living in peace with ourselves is the most desirable. Surely, in these cases, we are left with many things to say and darkness in which to shed light, the pain, the reproaches and all our emotional turmoil cannot remain within ourselves, we must get everything out of ourselves in some way, even if it is Let’s imagine that we have that person in front of us, even if it’s tearing papers or hitting cushions, let’s unload.
A good option is to write a letter to that person who hurt you in which you explain the reasons that made you leave and how you felt. Once the feelings and emotions of the moment are settled, written down, it is best to get rid of the letter and symbolically free ourselves from those sensations. Works!
Let go of the pain and forgive
Letting go of suffering is the only way to not make our body the tomb of our soul. Behind our impotence, our rage and our anger due to the unease of feeling undervalued, there is a great sadness and a feeling of humiliation. For this reason, we have to work on our disappointment and stop walking, risking our lives. You have to know when it is convenient to give away our absence. Then it will be time to leave behind and not forget that they are common situations that contain in them a great seed of growth and liberation. Probably you will not learn to give away your absence to those who do not value your presence, the first time you are disappointed in someone, like everything in life is a process but as this passes, we will realize that we are capable of recognizing when we should leave, to leave behind and close cycles and stages in our lives, simply but not always easily. Even when it’s painful, it’s only right that we value ourselves so we can get the same from others in return.
You go through people’s lives and they go through yours, no meeting is casual, you learn from everything, things have their fluid evolution, and things also tend to change course unexpectedly, it’s simply the law of life and things don’t always turn out as we hope or as perhaps we long for them to turn out, so one day, things begin to change and we begin to distance ourselves from that other person, nothing has happened but life, selfishness, disinterest.
Showing up just for commitment or to ask for something, nothing is what it was, and that’s when we do the impossible to resume, because everything is as before and it’s fine, for a while, but the day will come when you will have to give your absence, who does not value your presence and then, then time will tell.
“Loving yourself is the beginning of an eternal love story. Oscar Wilde”