Many of the couples will agree that when you get married, you do not only do it with your partner, in fact you also do it with your whole family. So here we will tell you how you can handle the situations that may arise in the best way. Of course, when a couple begins to formalize a relationship and have a common life, whether in courtship or marriage, they immediately become part of a new family, fulfilling the role of spouse. In some cases, it may be something rewarding and without any complications, but in other cases, it can become a trigger for countless problems between boyfriends or husbands. This is the law, to call it in some way, when a person chooses the other, also and in addition, chooses to be part of the other family. One blends in with the values,
You should know that in your relationship, as in all, the key is not just to smile and try to make all the members of your partner’s family like you. You must do more: be interested in knowing them, understanding them, accepting them and even forgiving them. From there you can start a friendly and lasting relationship.
First of all, there is the mother-in-law
. She is always the victim of the jokes, cataloged in a massive concept as a person involved, selfish, manipulative and a generator of couple conflicts. She is always “the bad one” when she is included in couple walks. But this situation is not to generalize either, although in many cases it is the mothers-in-law who are to blame for a marriage failing, it can be said that these are more exceptions than a general rule.
There are also keys to a good relationship with the mother-in-law and that is to establish clear and reasonable limits from the beginning. If she tries to interfere in matters that have to do with the relationship as a couple, the task of the son-in-law or of the couple itself is not to allow it and make that point very clear from the first moment. On the other hand, a classic conflict that occurs in interpersonal relationships is the one that commonly occurs between mother-in-law and daughter-in-law. Basically this rivalry between the two women occurs because there is a mother’s love on the one hand, and on the other the love of a wife or girlfriend. In this case, the role of husband or boyfriend and also of son will be a determining factor, since it is the common denominator between both women and must have the ability to make them both get along. There is another problem that forces couples to follow treatment with a therapist, and we are specifically referring to mothers who have overprotected their children throughout their lives, because when they leave the house to share a life with their partner, they again overprotective mothers seek to get into the relationship. They are still so concerned about the well-being of their son that they even end up burdening the daughter-in-law, which translates into more problems for the couple.
But not everything is bad in relation to mothers-in-law, there are those who are quite prudent and discreet, they know how to respect the couple’s decisions and are never pending. But no matter what type of mother-in-law you have, they truly make themselves felt when the grandchild is born and without a doubt, they will be there for you when you need them most.
The couple’s family
As time passes and the relationship solidifies, the in-laws will begin to become more and more present in the life of the couple and they will begin to participate more and more in an important way. Any type of event such as parties, birthdays, family reunions, etc. they begin to enter the couple’s agenda and in many cases, the family’s lifestyle may clash with the new member. It is important that in the face of this type of conflict, you speak directly with your partner so that she tries to solve it, of course it is advisable to be tactful when doing so. It is important that above all, the two support each other in the face of any inconvenience that may arise. There are three things that should be avoided as much as possible: criticize, belittle and much less compare in-laws.
The family of each
Although many do not even realize that, the relatives of both the groom and the bride are also guilty that many times the relationship does not work. Normally, experts recommend that the parents of each of the members of the couple stop depending on their children, so that an independent family can be created. I know, it is a difficult task to carry out but the children must be given enough freedom so that they can form a home, what is more, the children themselves could put limits on their parents, clarifying that they cannot get involved in couple matters. But yes, do it with all the respect that parents deserve and always showing that what they have done and the education they have received is valued.
But of course, as they say, each family is different and what is indicated would be that the relationship with the parents is not affected by the departure of the children from the house. On the contrary, they should be as happy as the couple that is forming a new home and, of course, give them the necessary support in this difficult stage that they are going to go through.
As it should be
What every couple wants is to always show a good relationship with both families, as this will not only guarantee a good relationship, but will also allow them to have unconditional support.
So here are some keys:
– Respect: towards the political family, their customs and way of life. – Prudence: Always avoid arguments, friction or any altercation. – Diplomacy: Always solve problems by speaking in a subtle and delicate way. – Time: Fundamental and necessary for one of the parties to enjoy with their family, without the other necessarily having to be present. – Sincerity: Show yourself to the political family as you are, without trying to pretend to be someone else. – Do not compare: Absolutely avoid comparisons of your relatives with theirs. – Dialogue: Important to reach agreements about the time that both should share with the other’s family. – Discretion: It is not necessary to divulge with your relatives and in detail, what happens within the couple.
To do?
Think before you act or speak. Not measuring your words or making comments out of place can bring you problems with your in-laws. Avoiding that is the best option for a cordial relationship. Communication is essential for good coexistence, therefore, if you are going to argue, you must avoid insults or degrading words towards the other’s family. Avoid dependencies, both from the couple to the parents and vice versa. Set limits when they want to interfere in the relationship. Accept the political family with its habits, virtues and defects in the best possible way. Always be united and that one can count on the support of the other to solve problems.
Having a political family is not easy, since in simple terms it implies a new way of life. But knowing how to listen, being prudent and flexible in some cases, will make the relationship with family members go in the right direction.
