In life we can reap several friendships: those that grow with us and always accompany us, those that are part of a stage and then disappear, those that have not really been authentic, the superficial and temporary ones that are when we step on the summit of success. True friendships are those that accompany us: in spite of everything, of the years, of the victories and the hells, those are the ones that we must know how to take care of. If the distance interrupts them, we tell you how to recover them.
1- Don’t let rejection scare you
Think about everything you’ve had the opportunity to experience with that friend. Remembering how important her company has been for you, when you most needed a helping hand, a shoulder to cry on, will let you know that it is a genuine friendship, something important that you must fight for and preserve.
Even if you have fought, do not let time or distance take you by surprise and pass you by. Look for it, be you who take that first step, it will be worth the effort.
2- The grudges that poison the soul
Learn to forget grudges, they only feed anger and do not allow you to forget, on the contrary, the wound will continue to bleed. You will never be completely free to find your inner peace. “As I walked out the door to my freedom, I knew that if I didn’t leave all the anger, hate, and resentment behind, I would still be a prisoner.” If Nelson Mandela understood the depth of what it is to learn to tear out the poison of the soul to get ahead, why can’t you try it? Your friendship is waiting for you to do it.
3- Take up the loose end and resolve what is pending
Sometimes we do not realize how important it is to resolve the pending accounts of the past, but nothing soothes the heart more than closing open wounds, answering questions that have not had answers at the time, in short, resuming the pending conversation and sustaining the loose end to put it back in the place it should always have been.
Throw that pride that does not allow you to talk to that friendship that is so important to you again. Pride hurts, humbly acknowledge that you need to take that step. It doesn’t matter if your friend doesn’t, be the one who takes the first step and put your heart on her hand.
Be honest Do not forget that he has been your confidant and that he has always understood you, he will expect you to be honest about your life and your conflicts. The first thing to recover a friendship is to regain trust.
Best friends share secrets, maybe it’s time to do it again.
5- We all change over time
But in essence we are who we always were. The person we have been is intact.
Time can be a great ally to help us preserve that inner essence, but it can also let the different situations we have to go through load us with the backpack of experiences and allow us to change our conception of things, our vision of the world. . Perhaps when we had that friend around we thought in one way regarding a certain topic and it is likely that now we have changed our idea about it. We all go through this, experiences change us, pains and joys. If your friend surprises you with something you did not expect, do not close yourself, she opens your mind and your heart to understand her and to be able to place you in her place.
6- Starting to talk will not be difficult
Although time and circumstances have taken them in different directions, there is always a ball of yarn where to start.
You know what kept them together to motivate the reunion and remember again the friends they were, what made them cry and laugh together. No matter what has happened, what time has done with each one, the important thing is that they have given each other the opportunity to meet again, and that meeting is not only physically but also, it is about meeting again and recognizing each other as the friends that always have been.
7- The old anecdotes
When we see an old friend again, there are never those unforgettable anecdotes missing. Those have been indelible moments that marked our lives, that fill us with joy and remind us that friendship is worth recovering.
Nothing better than the knowing smile that reminds us of the best moments we have lived with special friends. That really strengthens the friendship. They are common threads of a friendship impossible to break.
8- Common questions: the most important
You haven’t seen her for a long time, you don’t know many things about her life, so ask her about her family, her projects, her partner. This is not only so that you can find the points from which to resume pending conversations, but also so that she notices your real interest in knowing what has become of her.
Remember that you can not change the past, but by making the decision to do the right thing and try to recover a friendship, you can recover much more than what you have lost. Think of musical notes: the moment when two strings that make the same pitch are heard in unison, even though you only played one of them.