They say that love is just an inert word until someone appears in whom it takes shape, molds itself and comes to life. To keep it alive you have to learn to feed it every day. However, being in a relationship, not everything is perfect, there are always magical moments, but also difficult to cross: the bridges of great tests that make the relationship grow and strengthen or decline.
In this process we often say and do things that we greatly regret. We can be hurtful almost without thinking and in that swing of the couple everything can collapse. We tell you more about the mistakes that lead you to lose the man of your life.
It’s hard for them to tell you right off the bat that your attitude annoys them. The vast majority of men, although not all, have a hard time expressing their emotions and may simply decide to forget the matter or worse get away from you.
Love does not need to be perfect, the only important thing in the couple is that what exists between them is sincere. Nothing more, but nothing less. Assuming this assertion takes time and in the meantime we make mistakes that can be fatal. There is a starting point that you should never forget when starting a relationship: getting to know each other. Any relationship that aims to last over time is based on learning to get to know each other and generating a climate of trust that will later sustain the relationship.
risk phrases
When you are with someone you must start by understanding that you are sharing your time with another person who is different from you. Although they get along, have common tastes, they are not the same, they have, at some point, ways of conceiving things that are very different.
We usually write down phrases that we don’t think is bad at all, but we have a duty to think about whether the person who receives it can be bothered. Now you are not alone, you must learn to place yourself in his place and see how he would react. Any poorly expressed phrase will generate misunderstandings, even if it was not your intention. He will think that you do not value him, that you do not take him into account.
Difficulties, as the relationship progresses and consolidates, arise. It is natural, but it is in your hands to know how to play that game, thinking carefully about each move on the board of your relationship. The secret is in the way you solve things every time it’s your turn to move your pieces.
You must learn to negotiate, to listen and to share. Discussions that go around in circles are going nowhere, especially if they include offense. He will tire too quickly. Keep in mind that you are the owner of your silences, but the slave of your words. Once they left your lips you can’t get them back. He may try to make the effort to forget the situation, but there is a risk that in the next fight he will bring out in front of you that needle that you have stuck in him, because words also hurt.
The bad habit of reproaches
It is important that we understand that entering a relationship implies, in a certain way, surrender, granting some things, adapting to new situations and people, on both sides, does not mean that we should sacrifice ourselves in what we do not want to abandon. It is not about stripping but adapting to each other. That is coexistence.
If we don’t understand this clearly, then reproaches come in the middle of any fight: “I left this for you”, “I changed my life to be with you, my friends, my career”.
If you are going to sacrifice yourself too much for him, think about it very well, because at the least expected moment of crisis, reproaches will arise as the ace up your sleeve. Think that if you have left something you have done it out of love and you should never regret it. Don’t do anything that you may regret for the rest of your life. Talking and clearing accounts on time can save your relationship.
When you don’t consider their effort
Although we love to be told that they love us, not all men have the ease with words to do so, but that does not stop them from having attitudes with which they give us ample signs of their love. That’s something you need to start to understand. He cares about you, treats you like a queen, is aware of what you need, accompanies you and never lets you down, fills you with details… you already know that what he feels for you is as great as that love that you have him Yes, it is important that he tells you that he loves you and you can find a way to let him know, but weigh what he has given you in return for the precise words and you will know how to find the answer you are looking for.
“It goes without saying, everyone already knows, we love each other and that’s enough.” The poet William Baecker confirms it for you in these beautiful verses. The good beginning of a couple relationship is marked by the way in which both meet and converge in common spaces, in that feeling comfortable with each other and that is when they learn to know each other and get along. You will gradually learn their likes and dislikes.
Knowing and understanding it will be the basis of coexistence, it will help you to make fewer mistakes, to think about your answers and how to deal with it.
There is a saying that goes like this: “you cannot defend someone you do not love and you cannot love someone you do not know”.
