Be careful if you come across this type of person in life, it can be dangerous. Psychological manipulators, disguising their real intentions, are like wolves in sheep’s clothing.
Among the main characteristics of this type of person; This is that in order to control all situations and get away with it in a very cunning way, they never show their true personality, using deception as a weapon whenever they consider it necessary.
They get what they want done in a subtle and indirect way by manipulating their environment. They manage to generate a feeling of doubt about your own decisions. Through their cheating strategies they question your feelings. They use emotional blackmail with which they manage to put others at their disposal. Manipulative people manage to make you doubt your thoughts and intuition by making you a more vulnerable person. They tend to be good speakers, experts in turning things around for their convenience, as we said earlier through psychological blackmail,
The manipulator is skillful when unbalancing the balance, tilting it in his favor by destabilizing power and thus being able to obtain benefits at the expense of the other person, but without it being obvious to his victim.
Use the lie in an intelligent way, they are expert deniers, when receiving a claim for the damage caused, they deny things they have said, confusing you, going from perpetrator to victim.
Characteristics of a psychological manipulator.
There are small signs or clues that appear in certain attitudes of a person to discover if you are with what psychotherapists define as an “emotional manipulator”. 1- They are usually characterized by being in toxic relationships, be it family, work, couple or friendship type in which one of them knows how to take advantage of the other, detecting the other’s weak point, these people do not usually have many scruples , so they take advantage of the weakness to manipulate. They will make you put their values and needs above yours by making you give them up.
2- They live centered on themselves, they do not know the word reciprocity, they pay attention to what you can give them and never what they can offer or help you with. They will rarely selflessly ask how you are or if you need anything. They are not interested in your feelings, they only care about their own needs and desires. They avoid having conversations in which the other person wants to express their feelings and every time the other person tells them that they feel bad for some reason they put themselves in the place of victims or attack the other with things that they know can hurt or annoy them instead of toasting support, they prefer to attack. They never apologize for the damage caused.
3- Manipulators often use trickery and show another face, so through selfish and dominant attitudes they cover up great insecurity, they are people with low self-esteem and many fears but nevertheless they try to give the opposite image.
4- Their “constructive” criticism is not constructive at all, quite the opposite. Most of the time he criticizes in a mocking and derogatory way and justifies it with the fact that they are “just jokes”
These types of people are the ones who behind “their jokes” constantly make fun of the other in front of their loved ones such as family and friends.
They use sarcasm to embarrass their victim, taking advantage of the fact that they are vulnerable so that they doubt themselves, that is, they take advantage of the other’s insecurities to assert themselves.
5- He is always the one misunderstood: Another typical characteristic of emotional manipulators is the contempt for the other by assuming that “they will not understand” their problems, that is why they do not even tell them. But they get angry when you don’t meet their needs. “They want you to feel inferior to them by claiming that you probably won’t understand what they feel,” says American psychologist Beatty Cohan.
6- Hiding things and lying are on their list of strategies, they have a great ability to twist reality and take it to the place they want through lies or hiding things, whether personal or from another, they have evasive responses to situations that can leave them exposed. But they will want to know everything about each other because that information can serve as a tool for them tomorrow. The best manipulators can get the other to confess a lot without them realizing it.
7- When they are discovered in their actions, they become experts in denial. When he receives the claim about the damage he caused, the first thing he does is deny everything and quickly change the course of the situation, becoming a victim in the eyes of the injured person and being the guilty party.
8- He takes advantage of your weakness, a manipulator uses the emotions of others to take advantage, when there are intense feelings the other person does not think clearly, sometimes makes them believe that they depend on them, using from fear to guilt to pressure others. others to give him something in return. At first, the manipulator tends to help as much as he can, as if it were something compulsive, which he cannot stop. He will please you in everything. But he waits because it is a ruse, because they will know how to find the exact time, to let you know that all those actions were never 100% selfless.
Imparting blame on the other is one of your main tools. “Look what you’ve done”, “I never treat you so badly” are phrases that a manipulator uses to frighten his victim.
Over time, without realizing it, the manipulated person ends up leading a life that is not the one he wants, he has put his life at the manipulator’s disposal, putting it above personal needs and interests. Many times the victim justifies the manipulator and/or even feels guilty about the situation, and that is precisely her goal. A manipulative person is not an honest, transparent or responsible person.
You must pay attention to the signals, when they are repeated. It does not mean that you live distrusting the good deeds of everyone, but if certain behaviors are repeated over and over again, it is better that you get as far away from that person as possible.